


Cyrano

by shadowkitty



Category: A-Team (2010)
Genre: Character of Color, M/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-09-22
Updated: 2010-09-22
Packaged: 2017-10-12 02:47:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/119933
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shadowkitty/pseuds/shadowkitty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For the <a href="http://kink-bam.dreamwidth.org/437.html?thread=2229#cmt2229">kink_bam</a> prompt, <i>Murdock takes seduction tips from Face, and tries them on BA. With varying levels of success.</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	Cyrano

B.A. really hated the feeling of being watched. He could still feel eyes burning into the back of his head, so he stopped welding and turned around. Yup, Murdock was still there. He really didn't mean to catch his eye. "Those goggles make your head look fat," Murdock blurted, then ran out the door. B.A. sighed. This was why you didn't poke the crazy.

He was prepared to swear he hadn't done anything to deserve Murdock poking his bicep the next time he saw him and asking "Is that muscle or fat in there?" with an expectant look on his face.

B.A. would, however, admit that poking Murdock's temple and replying "Is that brain or fat in there?" was unoriginal, childish, and apparently the wrong answer judging by the way Murdock scowled at him.

"Yeah, well, your mohawk is crooked."

"No it ain't!" Murdock looked utterly delighted as B.A. went to the mirror to check.

***

"So," Face looked squarely at his own feet and rubbed the back of his head, "How are you and Murdock… How _are_ you and Murdock?"

"Little asshole keeps trying to pick fights with me and I don't know why." Face glanced up with a surprised look.

"He said my mohawk was crooked," and B.A. did not sound dejected about that. At all.

To his surprise, Face started snickering. "That's not exactly what I meant for him to do."

"What _you_ meant? This is your fault?"

"Uh. Kinda. Murdock maybe… likes you. So I was trying to help him. Telling him what to say to you. That kind of thing. He, uh, doesn't take instruction well." B.A. was no fool. Nobody gave advice that bad without a reason.

B.A.'s mama had been a big costume drama fan. He didn't usually pay much attention while she watched, but _this_ one he remembered. It was the guy giving the instructions who was the one in love with the… he refused to think of himself as the damsel in distress. He expected this kind of thing from Murdock, but he had no idea how to handle a situation where Face was playing up. He was going to have to end this now.

"Face, we're buddies, right?"

"You're not mad?"

"Nah. I love you, dude. As a friend! Just not, you know, like that. You're my buddy. You'll always be my friend, but we could never be together. I just don't see you that way."

Face stared at him for a little while, obviously overcome, then said "Thanks, man. That's really big of you. I'm touched. Really. But you're an idiot and I wouldn't do you if you were the last man on earth. **Murdock!** " he yelled. "Where the hell are you?"

Murdock slowly poked his head into the room. "You _told_ him," he said, accusingly.

"Were you practicing _neg hits_ on B.A.?" Face sounded torn between horrified and impressed.

"You said they were for if you wanted to hit on someone hotter than you," said Murdock.

"Okay, I did, but I don't think you're gonna lower B.A.'s self esteem by picking on his fashion choices," Face paused. "In fact, I'm pretty sure lowering B.A.'s self esteem wouldn't make him sleep with you."

"Fool, what the hell kind of values are you trying to teach Murdock? He can't go around being nasty to people to get them to date him!"

"It's not like I'm particularly desirable any other way," said Murdock.

"You're plenty desirable, dumbass!" B.A. snapped at him. "Wait, that didn't…"

"Do not, under any circumstances, take that back. I worked way too hard for that," said Face.

"Oh yeah? You ever try that neg hit thing yourself?"

"Like I said to Murdock, you only use them if the person you're trying to flirt with is hotter than you," he grinned. "Nobody's hotter than me!" B.A. rolled his eyes and mentally translated from Face to English.

"She slapped you, didn't she?"

"She _punched_ me, man. Big black eye. And now I'm gonna walk away from the most awkward conversation of my entire life. See if I play matchmaker again."

Murdock was obviously working up to something, so B.A. intervened. "You wanna go out, get some food? Just the two of us? We can talk about stuff."

"You'd be okay with that?"

"Yeah, that'd be cool."

"Should I go change?" asked Murdock.

"Nah," B.A. poked him in the chest, "All your shirts suck anyway." Revenge was sweet.


End file.
